So besides the inane choice to shoot this against a mirror, just in case Bobby wanted to break into a rendition of Price's When Doves Cry, there's that "perfect" fly ball form. Bobby's rep. has always been that he's too afraid of the wall to catch fly balls over his head. Much speculation has swirled as to the cause of his mental-fly-ball-blockage. Finally we have an answer. In this photo shot as a rookie, Bobby tragically ran into the mirror sending shards everywhere, and scaring poor Abreu for life. Seriously, Abreu is actually Mr. Glass from the movie "Unbreakable". And he's got a porn-stache.
OK, Josh Beckett looks like he is only twelve in this picture, so I should go easy on him right? Wrong! That intense look in Beckett's eyes that later in life would intimidate hitters, is at this point more the hairy-palms/going-blind kind of stare. Really, he looks like he's watching Girls Gone Wild 7. Fortunately for Josh the picture cuts off what his hands are doing; namely checking the dangle.
Either I've had one too many Presbyterians heavy on the Rye Whiskey, or Jason Giambi travelled to the past and ate his nineteen year old self after this photo shoot. He looks like David Eckstein for Christmas sakes. Hostess Ding-Dongs and Horse 'roids, the breakfast of douche bags.
Bloody sock? How about bloody upper lip. I mean is that a really virulent strain of herpes on his face, or what? Curt Schilling: lap-diving into Ho's since 1989.
To be fair this doubled as Sammy's head-shot for Paradise Island. It's amazing what a good shave and mangos glazed with HGH can do for a guy.
1 comment:
there just aren't enough nasty staches in baseball today...
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